


It Was Always You

by Riellebratt



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-19
Updated: 2018-03-19
Packaged: 2019-04-04 12:29:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14020281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Riellebratt/pseuds/Riellebratt
Summary: After Livewire gave her life for Kara's at Fort Rozz it became clear to her that she's had it all wrong and decides it's time to go to the one she loves most.





	It Was Always You

**Author's Note:**

> After watching the Fort Rozz episode and hearing Ingrid Michaelson's song - Always you, I came up with this little one shot. I hope you like it.

~~~~

* * *

 

 

Hovering outside the townhouse, the wind, and rain whipped through her but she felt nothing. She hadn't felt anything in a very long time until tonight; it all came to her during the conversation with Mon-El out on the balcony of the DEO. She was thinking the hurt and pain that she'd been dealing with were because Mon-El had moved on; that she was in love with him and now he was no longer available. It hurt, it was painful to see him happy with another, but it wasn't the reason why she was feeling empty, lost, and alone. No after tonight on the balcony with him, she realized what she had been feeling all this time had nothing to do with him at all.

The death of Leslie affected Kara more than she realized. Yes, she knew the woman had come a long way since she first became Livewire but when Cat suggested, convinced her really, to give Leslie another chance to prove herself, Kara never thought it would come to this. Having her sacrifice her life for Kara was more heroic than she could possibly understand. Kara took a deep breath and slowly let it out. Her heart hurt for Leslie, she had persuaded her to join her on the mission, to help her and then she let her die.

Mon-El was doing his best to comfort her but she was lost in thought during the conversation because it wasn't right. He was not the right person to be out there with her, trying to make her feel better. She needed to get away but he hadn’t stopped talking. And then she looked at him, really looked at him, and wondered how she could think she was ever in love with him. She smiled realizing what a fool she had been, she wanted to laugh but he was trying to be strong for her and console her after what happened on Fort Rozz. So she listened to him, thanked him, and told him that his advice made sense because it did now, he was not the one for her and never was.

Now here she was in Washington in the worst rain storm in history hovering outside Cat's house. The woman who made her who she is, the woman who helped her become the hero she always wanted to be. Who gave her the strength, the guidance, and love to be the best Kara Danvers and the best Supergirl she could.

It was late and Cat was just arriving home in a black town car. The driver held the door while a man opened an umbrella and helped her out. Kara watched as Cat took the man's hand and smiled and when he leaned in for a kiss, Kara's heart stopped. Had she been too late? Had Cat found someone too?  
As she watched, Cat leaned away from the man, having his kiss land on her cheek. Kara heard the woman thank him for a wonderful evening but that she was tired and wanted to get in from the rain. They walked to the door together but it was only Cat who went inside.

Kara released the breath she has been holding and watched as the car drove away. She turned her attention back to the house when the lights were turned on. The moment she'd been wanting had finally arrived yet Kara couldn’t seem to move forward. Afraid that what she's feeling is only one sided, she wondered if she's made the right decision to come here at all.

Movement from within the townhouse caught Kara's attention as she watched the woman she admired all these years pour herself a large tumbler of scotch but didn't drink from it. Placing the glass back on the silver tray on top of the bar, the woman placed her hands on the edge and with hunched shoulders; she let out a heavy sigh.

Kara couldn't hold out any longer, she needed Cat but watching the woman now, she knew that she was needed too. So with a small burst she landed on the balcony and quietly knocked on the white French doors. Startled, Cat quickly turned around with the square crystal decanter in her hand at the ready, when she saw a soaked and downtrodden Supergirl outside her door.

Putting the decanter back down onto the bar, Cat quickly walked to the door and let the young woman in. "Supergirl, what are you doing here?"

"I...I...uh, hi!" Kara replied unsure and then gave a little wave.

"Please get inside you're soaked through, you'll catch your death." Cat admonished and stepped back to let the woman in.

Kara did a super spin and dried off instantly and smiled, "I can't get sick remember?"

Cat stood there watching with an impressed look then put her hand on her tilted hip. "That's handy, but I do remember when you lost your powers and you were sick so don't give me that."

"I, uh that's true but as you can see I have my powers, or I would have knocked on your door dressed casually, you know as Kara Danvers." Kara rambled unsure what to say or do now that she is this close to Cat with the knowledge of her true feelings for the woman. She walked over to Cat and wrapped her arms around her, hugging her, and whispering an 'I missed you' into her hair.

Hugging back as hard as she could, Cat sighed and whispered, "I missed you too," and then stepped out of the embrace that lasted a little longer than it should and Cat wanted to regain her composure after seeing the woman she left to keep her distance.

Walking back to her bar, she lifted the glass of scotch she’d poured moments before and took a healthy sip then turned back to Kara and watched the rollercoaster of emotions playing across the young hero's face. Knowing her confession of missing the girl was not something she wanted to reveal.

"Kara, are you all right? I heard about what happened with Leslie." Cat spoke bringing Kara out of her thoughts as she walked closer to her.

"While I don't know every detail as to what happened up there, I know you and you think that her death is your fault and I'll tell you that it isn't."

"She saved me, she saved my life. She jumped in front... It should have been me, Cat. She didn't want to go there, I convinced her to go, so it is my fault!"

"Kara," Cat said softly as she put her hand on the Kara’s arm, "Leslie would never have gone if she didn't want to because she only did what she wanted to do, that's what made her special. Leslie may have given her life but I know she did it on her own terms, it's who Leslie was."

"No, it was all me..."

"Leslie gave her life to help you, to save you so you can save us from the world killers, don't diminish her sacrifice, Kara. This is not the time to punish yourself because you cannot control everything and you sure as hell could not control Leslie. As I said before Leslie did what she wanted and she wanted to help you because you gave her another chance. She may not have been one to say thank you but she was very thankful. Saving you was something I'm sure would have made her very proud, so let her have that and move on Kara, no more dwelling. Yes, we will mourn our friend, but we all have to keep going, don't let her sacrifice be in vain, don't let it become your downfall."

Kara sat down on the nearest chair, leaned down, put her head into her hands, and cried. She cried for Leslie who gave her life for hers, for those in National City who have been hurt or killed because she wasn’t strong or quick enough to save them, she cried for her sister's breakup, her unhappiness, she cried because this is what she needed, who she had always needed, Cat.

Cat couldn't watch the heartbroken woman sitting there any longer, so she sat down beside her, wrapped her arms around her, and hugged with all she had. "It's all right; you're going to be all right, Kara. You are the strongest person that I know and I do not mean physical strength. In here," Cat lays her hand above Kara's heart. "This is where you are the strongest and most capable and feared on this planet. You are a force of nature; and this is how you will beat the world killers, this is how you will survive and continue on. No one has a heart full of love and compassion like you do, Kara, no one. This is how you are the strongest of them all."

"I...I can't do this alone, Cat. I can't."

"You're not alone, Supergirl, you have the DEO, you have the Legion of Superheroes, you have..."

"You?" Kara asked softly as she looked up at the woman who was still holding her.

Looking down, Cat smiled, "Of course you have me, I'll always be here for you, Kara."

Shaking her head, Kara pulled out of Cat's arms, stood up, and walked towards the window. "What happened at Fort Rozz is not the only reason why I'm here tonight, Cat." With a deep breath, Kara continued on as she turned towards the woman she loved. "I came here because when I was standing on the DEO balcony wishing you were there to talk to, Mon-El came out and tried to comfort me but as he was talking I realized that it was all wrong. Everything, everything that I have been going through, what I have been feeling was all wrong. It was wrong because it was him there instead of you, that he was the one that I was sad over but it was really you. It was wrong thinking that it was him that I was heartbroken over because it was you."

As Kara was confessing her feelings, she watched Cat, hoping she could tell from her expression what affects her words were having on the woman but she couldn't tell so Kara continued on.

"It was you, Cat, it has always been you. Whether you feel the same about me I don't, I just needed you to know. I just needed you to...Rao, why is this so hard? I love you Cat, I've always loved you, you have made me stronger than any yellow sun, you have made me the confident, happy woman I've always wanted to be but I can't be this strong, this force of nature without you. I don't want you to just be there for me Cat; I want you to be with me always. I love you. I am so in love with you."

With only being a few feet apart, the two women stood looking at one another. The silence was unbearable for Kara and she wanted to fly out of there. It seemed that Cat didn't feel the same and she was choosing her words on how to let Kara down without hurting her. Not being able to take it any longer, Kara decided to apologize and go back to National City and try to forget about this night.

"I...its okay, Cat I understand. I'll just go, and we can just..."

"Kara." Cat said softly, hoping to stop the young woman's apology and rambling. "Please, come and sit down here with me."

Kara slowly walked over to the sofa and sat hesitantly next to Cat thinking that she's going to be let down and she really doesn't want to hear it.

"Kara, we've been through a lot together and I watched you grow into a wonderful, assertive, caring, brave, and loving woman. With or without the suit you have always been my hero. I didn't want to get in the way of your progress at Catco and as Supergirl. I wanted and still want the very best for you and I thought that I wasn't it, that I would just hold you back, so I left. I left to allow you to grow but to also step back and 'dive' but I must confess, it wasn't to try new things, it was to abscond, to flee from the feelings I have for you."

Kara's breath hitched when she heard Cat say she had feelings for her, but before she could say anything, Cat continued with what Kara believed was a 'but', because there was always a 'but'.

Cat took a breath, she needed to get this out but she was nervous, no not nervous, she was scared, terrified. Kara may have said that she was in love, but was she really, was she what Kara really wanted?

"Kara, I am so much older than you, I'm disagreeable, ornery and just hateful at times. I didn't believe that the person that I am would be someone you would want to be with let alone love. And the feelings I felt were more than a boss should have for their employee. But you haven’t been just an employee to me since your first week on the job. No, you stirred things within me that I had no idea were ever there. I pushed them aside, of course. And when Adam came to town because of you, I fell more for you than before, which is why I chose to push you and Adam together. I know it wasn't one of my best ideas but it was what I thought was right at the time. I couldn't have been more wrong, and then pushing you towards James was another idea I thought would help the feelings I have for you. But it only made them worse. The thought of you with someone else made my heart hurt."

"Cat."

"No I need to get this out, Kara. I've held this in too long. Please indulge me this."

Cat never said please, so Kara nodded her head and sat back but took Cat's hand in hers and gave it a gentle squeeze encouraging her to continue.

"The closer we became the more unbearable it was and I needed to leave because I didn't think you could ever feel for me as I feel for you. So I left and well I was lost, I didn't know what I wanted to do or where to go. Carter made it clear after two weeks that he wanted to stay with his father, to go to school to be with his friends instead of traveling the unknown with me. I understood but then I was alone and I knew I had made the wrong decision but when I do something, I go all in. Ending up in Bhutan living in a yurt was the last thing I ever thought I would do yet there I was and all I could think about was you. I wondered how you were doing, how you were feeling, I couldn't get you off my mind. I left you to stop the feelings I had for you and I end up in a wigwam thinking of only you!"

Kara chuckled and then entwined their fingers together. Letting Cat know it was okay.

Cat looked down at their hands, watching as Kara stroked her thumb over her knuckles. Then looking up at Kara she saw the love in her eyes, which took Cat's breath away it was so intense. She looked back down and then quietly said, "I have no idea how you could love me or be in love with me, Kara but I do feel the same, I have for a very long time."

Kara lifted Cat's hand to her lips, kissed it gently, and then broke into her Sunny Danvers smile which made Cat smile in return. "You have just made me so very happy, Cat. Of course I love you, you may be disagreeable, ornery, but you're also, kind, considerate, sweet, adorable, cute..."

"I am not sweet, adorable, and cute!"

"Oh yes you are, you have never seen you when you have 3 pairs of glasses on at one time. You're caring Cat. You have a huge heart, maybe I'm one of the few lucky people who get to see that, and I love that about you. I love it all the good, the bad and the sweet adorable parts. I love you!"

Chuckling at the young woman, she could only shake her head. "I love you too, Kara Danvers. I love you too."

Kara brought her hand up and cupped Cat's cheek, searching her eyes to see if this was okay. Then slowly she brought her lips to Cat's. The kiss was soft, slow and she didn't want it to end. Even though a tear slipped down her cheek, Kara was happy, and knew she could do anything with Cat in her life, beside her, loving her.

Cat ended the kiss when she felt the tears and looked into Kara's eyes. She could only see the love but she wanted to make sure, "Are you all right? Is this not what you wanted?"

"This is what I've always wanted, Cat. I'm just so happy."

"Good, now kiss me again, Supergirl. Tomorrow we will fly back to National City and kick those world killers' asses."

Kara snorted, "Oh how I've missed you Cat Grant."


End file.
